4 Apr

I got up bright and early for daily Mass…right before I left I saw that I had an email from my mom.

She’s shocked, but not disappointed. She wants me to know she still loves me.

But.

I’m not allowed to talk to my little brother about anything religious. And my parents will no longer be helping me pay for school. Honestly, I’m more upset about the brother thing…not that I had any plans to proselytize him, but the fact that she would say something like that really hurts. Thankfully I only have one more semester of school left, so I think I can manage to scrape by.

My fiance however, is not taking my parents’ response quite as passively as I am. My reaction is to cry and not say anything, while his is to get mad and yell. Well…I think he’s yelling. His chats are written in all caps.

And in the midst of it all I think Body and blood of Christ, save me…

 

 

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11 Responses to “”

  1. Number 9 April 4, 2013 at 8:28 am #

    Wow. Bless you.

  2. SR April 4, 2013 at 8:29 am #

    I am glad that you heard from your Mom. Sometimes Ellie, “silence” is our best friend in matters such as this, regarding your brother, etc… In becoming a Catholic, you will find this more and more. There is a time to “defend” and a time to stay “quiet.” I would just respect their wishes, and pray that God will one day open up the “lines of communication.” This will also give you more time to learn things regarding the Church and her teachings, and you will probably be able to talk about it with more ease.

    As far as the college thing. I had a friend who we were walking one day, and the sole of her shoe came off, she was so poor trying to put herself through college. She did it though, and has been a teacher for the last 25 years. Lives in a beautiful home and has never had to walk again in a shoe with no sole. So where there is a will, there is a way. Praying for you. Love you and God Bless, SR

    • elliejaneohara April 4, 2013 at 9:16 am #

      I’m glad I heard from her too. One of my favorite movies is The Nun, with Audrey Hepburn. (I loved that movie even as a Protestant!) Throughout the movie she and the nuns talk about the value of practicing internal and external silence. I definitely feel like this is a time for both types of silence. I can’t argue my parents into being happy with my choice, so it’s better that I just allow them to speak their peace without saying much back other than an acknowledgement that I’ve heard them.

      The Lord has already provided for me to take care of $$$ for school for the rest of this semester, so I know He’ll help me find a way to get through the fall.

      • SR April 4, 2013 at 3:05 pm #

        Your response to my comment reminded me of something St. Faustina said. (She wrote a dairy called the Diary of St. Faustina if you want to read about her. She is my patron Saint.) Anyways she said, “God cannot deal with a chattering soul.” I have never fogotten that statement of hers. Sometimes in these moments in our lives, we have to silence our souls, so God can speak to us. Just some FYI. Love you and God Bless, SR

  3. pishnguyen April 4, 2013 at 12:32 pm #

    I am relieved and happy for you that you heard from your mom. And that she extended as much love and support as she could. Even if it wasn’t the response you were hoping for, at least you know you will not lose your parents. You know they still love you, and you know that you have not hurt them irreparably with your decision. I hope these things will bring comfort and some relief to you.

    I am sorry to hear about their restrictions regarding talking to your younger brother, as well as their decision not to pay for the rest of your schooling. It sounds like you feel comfortable / confident about managing the rest of school, and that is a wonderful thing. I pray for all of the financial burdens to work out for you. As for not being able to talk about religious things with your brother … I don’t know what to say. I can’t imagine your pain over that, and I am so, so sorry.

    I agree with SR regarding silence being your best friend in these types of situations. Hopefully, your parents will heal with enough time to get used to the idea that you are Catholic and with enough space. God bless your fiancé, though. I felt a little teary when I read the part about him getting angry on your behalf. It’s wonderful that he is so loving and supportive of you. I think that is a beautiful thing.

    Continued prayers for you. And for your family. God bless you, always.

    • elliejaneohara April 4, 2013 at 12:45 pm #

      It is comforting to have heard from them – even if it wasn’t an over-the-top positive response. My mom and I have been texting a little bit throughout the day, so I’m hoping by tomorrow she’ll be okay with talking on the phone.

      And yes…S is the best man I could ever ask for for a future husband. He wasn’t too sure at first that he was okay with my becoming Catholic, but as soon as he realized how much it means to me he was instantly on board and ready to fight anyone who even remotely challenged me haha.

      Thank you for the prayers – they mean the world to me!

  4. cinemacatechesis April 4, 2013 at 9:13 pm #

    God Bless you. I’m so glad you haven’t lost them as you feared might happen! Time will help. Keep prayin’!

  5. Jennwith2ns April 5, 2013 at 1:30 pm #

    I felt the brother thing like a kick in the gut. I can’t imagine being told not to communicate with my own brother about deep personal things. Are you guys close? What are his spiritual leanings? I’m going to pray about this for you most of all.

    • elliejaneohara April 5, 2013 at 1:37 pm #

      I’m very, very close to my brother. He’s in his early teens so my mom thinks he would be too easily influenced by me. I know that when he was younger he prayed the “sinner’s prayer,” but he refuses to be baptized and won’t explain why…so I’m really not sure where his heart is. Thank you so much for your prayers!

      • Jennwith2ns April 5, 2013 at 1:38 pm #

        Huh. That’s interesting. Well anyway, yes. Prayers. You have them.

      • elliejaneohara April 5, 2013 at 3:41 pm #

        Yeah…I’m really not sure what’s going through his mind. He and I both only ever went to Christian schools, and only ever had very Christian friends so I think maybe he’s just been over-satiated…I understand the feeling pretty well myself. I try really hard to walk the fine line of not pressuring him, but still getting him to think about spiritual things.

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